Author Archives

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Shut Up and You Will Like It – Really?

My thoughts are spinning in and out of belief in God.  Feeling angry and depressed most of the time for lack of perfection, not meeting expectations and expecting too much of myself.  And then another horrible bubble of hope comes up and renewed faith in God surfaces.  It would be easier to not have hope, than to have a bubble of it surface here and there.  Too little hope and the pieces I receive of it are not enough to sustain my trust in God.  Sometimes I wish God would just pack his two-faced bags and get off the planet in his square, bejeweled spaceship.  (see Revelations)  He can have his “special” light,  but I’d rather have the sun and the moon.  I don’t want to be “boxed” up and shipped away.  Why would I prefer a box to this beautiful planet?  He can have his gold, pearl and precious stone kingdom,  for it doesn’t appeal to me.

I have more bones to pick, I fear.  When God speaks to the churches like they are babies and can never once find no fault, gives very little encouragement and a lot of rules and then expects them to be happy??  Shut up and you will like it – Really?  When did I ever like it?  There is something really wrong here.  There cannot exist such a God as this.  God is not fickle.  To say good church in one breath and bad church in the next.  It’s like double arrows pointed at and away from eachother.   Communication with God, for me, ends in conflict and insanity.  If we were made in God’s image then God would be imperfect, too, but times infinity imperfect.  Do we really want to place our faith in a fickle and imperfect God?

Or is there someone/something out there impersonating God.  Wouldn’t the perfect God, the God who is rational, compassionate and loving get really, really pissed?  To see what the Fake God’s (FG) actions did?  All of the chaos FG caused, the pain and the suffering?  The conflict and the trial.

Here’s my thought.  I think it’s high time we let go of our old ideas and recreate our own concept of God.  Each and every one of us.  Let go of old, worn out religious ideals and religious texts.  The faith must be subtle and not all consuming, incorporated into every action, thought and deed.  It must be centered on compassion and tolerance.  For me.  You figure out your own God and your own beliefs and needs as you go through life.  I hope this makes sense and resounds with you all.

 

 

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Connecting the Dots

Within the reality we live in, there are sub-realities of our own making. They ripple out from each of us, forming a web of possibilities. Not quite the string theory. Only forming as it relates to each of us and our actions, thoughts and feelings. Understanding our part in how things unfold is critical for positive change.
Sometimes I feel stuck in two or more sub-realities as well as the one I share with others. This is a difficult place and it gets harder to “connect the dots”. And it’s harder to follow along with the story line that is my life. It’s hard to participate in life, and yet see it all happening around me.
When stuck in this different perception, it’s important for me to find peace, be alone and journal and try to figure out what is going on in my thoughts, actions and feelings and to see if I mesh. This process can take days, weeks and sometimes months. And Spring seems to be the season.
And although this perception may seem fundamental, it is very tangible with me. People start changing how they speak and act and seem to communicate what I need to hear, at the moment I need to hear it. Animals also exhibit odd, human-like behaviors that have meaning for me.
Does that me me crazy?

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Fear vs. Faith vs. No Faith vs. No Fear

I had an odd dream last night.  The place was similar to earth, but the animals were strange looking.  The people didn’t have the same belief system. There was no belief system.  The place was uncomplicated, yet chaotic.

My thoughts are lumbering and massive today.  So, I started thinking that having faith can make things both complicated and chaotic.  As humans try to make sense of this world and find that they cannot fully understand, even more effort is put into interpreting science, ancient texts, prophesies, petroglyphs, signs and dreams.  Too much effort and energy is devoted to this in my opinion.

The peaceful natives of our land have it right.  Working together, being at peace with the animals and environment.  Simple.  Easy.

These things make perfect sense to me.  And I am not fearful of my new perception.  I am…free to think my own thoughts.   I am… sure these thoughts are transient and will not last forever.  I am… not crazy.  No fear.

There is no fear even though I may have come to the wrong conclusions.  I am not embarassed or humiliated if I am wrong.  I am clear that it’s okay to experience these thoughts as part of a process.   And that the universe is okay with me thinking these thoughts.  I will not be struck down for my somewhat heretical views.  It’s going to be okay.

Look at nature.  It just is.  Look at humans.  We are not just being, we are always in conflict.  This tells me we are the newcomers to earth.  Not the most intelligent.  Maybe we are just the most arrogant for thinking we know it all.  For thinking we are superior to all life forms, that we have all the answers.  If the latter were true, wouldn’t the earth be in better shape than it is?  Sheesh, what a mess we’ve created.  Working, always working.  More money, less time.  Heart and health issues.

Some belief systems have harnessed this peace.   Perhaps it is time I learned.

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Who is right? Who is wrong?

Who determined right from wrong? Sane from insane?  Who has the right to make these judgements?  Shouldn’t we let God decide? How do we do this?  Why not just ask for His help?  Sounds simple, right?  It’s about making a conscience contact with him daily, perhaps several times a day, to ask for His help in all things.  You only need to ask.  He’s waiting for you to talk to him to guide you, nurture and protect you.

When your intent and your heart are in the right place magical things happen.  All evil and injustice are overcome.  You forgive and love again. Ask for his help humbly.  He is here, He is now.  Always.

 

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Prophesy/Schmophesy-Communication

There is a reason I am empathic.  There is a reason I can communicate in written and oral forms.  From parents who took transcription (from oral to written format) and technical writing (of owner’s manuals for complicated equipment).  I can only translate my experiences – of what I see, hear and feel.  And lend my thoughts for a better way, as I see it.  As it occurs for me.  Sometimes wacky and meaningless, but sometimes profound and inspired.  Only human.  Imperfect.

When we look back on our lives and how we have arrived at our present circumstance, sometimes there is clarity.  Sometimes only hurt, resentment and confusion.  When we look at our part in our present circumstance, the latter feelings seem to pass away.  I am forced to look at my belief systems when I do this.  I must embrace and reject my Christian heritage. For personal reasons.  I am bound to embrace all religions and yet not lend my energy or commitment to any one sect or denomination of any religion, group or organization.  This is only important as it applies to me.

What I am present to, is that we have to look at who we are, what we believe in and focus on that with all of our being.  With all of our hearts.  With all of our minds.  With our bodies.

On the other hand, our beliefs don’t have to be inflicted on anyone else.  This is an immensely personal thing.  Regardless of what any one prophet or prophesy may have said.

We have the ability to change the future and shape the present.  But we cannot change the past.  We can only learn from the past and move forward with our lessons.

Be at peace with who you are, try and learn from your mistakes and stand up for justice.  Peacefully and with great care and compassion.

As I write these words, I am clear that I did not set out to write them.  Make your own interpretation of this and what it may imply, since I do not understand it.  I just know I am an interpretor of what I see, hear and feel.

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Dragons

A lot of myths surround dragons.  Perhaps the greatest lesson is not to fear them.  They represent strength, individuality, and have the ability to fly.  They are able to get from point A to point B with no assistance.  Some dragons are purple, blue or red.  Some dragons are green or yellow.  Give no meaning or strength to the color of the dragon, they only represent us, at our finest.  Wings out , living our dreams, free. Be careful what you believe in, make it count.  Make it meaningful.

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Meandering Thoughts

Sometimes the best education comes from taking the time to digest the day’s events in the evening.  A quiet room, no electronics on, maybe with your favorite pet on your lap.  Just quietly thinking.  Likely, you will reflect on what people have said, how you identified and responded to people, animals, the environment.  Looking back at our day gives us a barometer we can use to look at ourselves and learn and grow.  Peaceful and easy.

If your thoughts are too fast to think, take pen and paper out and write them down.  Writing forces you to physically connect with the words, slowing your thoughts with the action of writing.  Quiet time.  No music, no ambient noise.  Silence, then thinking or writing.

This is not rocket science.  It’s easy.  Don’t worry about phonetics, punctuation.  It doesn’t matter.  Your thoughts don’t need words.  Sometimes your thoughts are pictures and emotions.  Go ahead and feel them again.  Don’t be afraid of this.  Once you move through it, it flows over you like  water, and washes away.  Not scary. Simple.

These are only my thoughts.  They wander a bit.  But I believe the above process can heal us all.

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My Simple Outlook

I believe we all come to this earth with a destination in mind. The road we travel may be infinitely varied, but we get to the point we’re supposed to be at in God’s good time. I also believe that He speaks to us though animals, plants, and some people. People who actually speak what we are thinking about. It’s the best way he can communicate with us. It’s simple, and I don’t need to understand the complexities here. It’s not my place. I only know that when I’m in the right spot, listening properly, good things happen. They happen fast. Be still, listen, and the rest is magic!